Since we already covered Thanksgivukah, we’re safe to wish our goyishe friends a very Merry Christmas this year. For those celebrating Festivus today, let’s have an airing of the grievances, shall we?

1. How come there are no honest contractors around? Why don’t any of them take pride in their work?

2. People who leave their shopping carts in the middle of the aisle. WTF? Like you are the only ones in the store?

3. If anyone has a husband who actually listens to them, raise your hand. Yeah, I thought not.

4. Bluetooth. I’m tired of trying to figure out whether people are crazy or talking on the phone. I’m also tired of thinking they are talking to me and responding.

5. Hipster or Hick? I can’t tell the difference. They all have beards and flannel shirts. Hicksters. All of ’em.

6. Speaking of hicks, what’s with the Honey Boo Boos and the Duck Folks? Why do people feel the need to watch the lowest common denominator and then complain when they find out they are racist homophobes? As if it’s surprising.

7. People who keep talking or texting when I say I’m busy or trying to sleep. Get a clue.

8. Chronic complainers. Oh wait….

Well, have a good one! See you on Wednesday!