This is what Twitter is all about. I don’t give a shit if some crafter had oatmeal with grapes for breakfast. But when some genius tweets as the “Bronx Zoo Cobra“, I get giddy.

If you’ve been sleeping under a rock….well then you should know first hand about the cobra who escaped from The Bronx Zoo. I don’t remember the city being so on edge since Son of Sam was on the loose. Yeah, like the snake is gonna make his/her way to your house! Well, to be honest, if I lived in The Bronx, I’d be pooping my pants right about now.

Anyway, the snake is a local celebrity, with over 126,000 Twitter followers as of this writing.

Does this have something to do with the End of Days? Does the snake come back? I dunno. Didn’t read the book.

Some of my favorites tweets:

Getting my morning coffee at the Mudtruck. Don’t even talk to me until I’ve had my morning coffee. Seriously, don’t. I’m venomous.

Donald Trump is thinking about running for president?! Don’t worry, I’ll handle this. Where is Trump Tower exactly?

In front of the diner used in Seinfeld. Niiice! They’re real and they’re spectacular.

Enjoying a cupcake @magnoliabakery. This is going straight to my hips. Oh, wait. I don’t have hips.