So, this Alabama chick desperately wants to move to Brooklyn and posts a donation listing on Etsy (actual listing deleted). You know, she’s a young artist, blah, blah, blah. She’s looking to raise $2500 and settle into a 1 bedroom apartment.

Brokelyn caught this non-story first and then Gothamist picked up on it. Now I feel sorry for her.

The Brokelyn comments are somewhat obnoxious but also apologetic. Basically, people are saying they worked hard to get to this paradise and there are no handouts for fresh faced wannabees. At the time of this writing (last night) there was only one native Brooklynite posting and that was me. I was all like “We don’t need any more artist transplants.” Seriously, we have enough.

Ok, I could see me being obnoxious. Most born and bred New Yorkers I know aren’t having a love affair with the skinny-jean-wearing-lose-that-stupid-beard-hipster-doofus-from-Ohio. But where’s the love from the fellow Alabama (or insert boring state here) doofusi? Lock the door behind you? Not very peaceloveandunderstanding of you.

Jeez, and the Gothamist comments are brutal! Insulting her art and her looks? You know these losers are just sore because they didn’t think of it first! I almost want to give her money just to prove these brats wrong.

But I won’t. I’ll just bitch about it instead.