**Archive. Originally posted: May 28, 2008
1930-2008
5/27/08 My father passed at 9:30 tonight. This post was written while we waited.
It’s a well known fact. New York Jews go down to Florida to die. Of course it’s terribly sad. But it’s also pretty humorous. And I don’t feel too bad laughing about it because my father would be the first one cracking jokes if he could. Anyway, I feel like I’m caught up in a bad Seinfeld episode.
The other day when we went to visit the hospital we ran into THREE other people we knew. A friend of the family whom had been helping my mom and visiting my dad all along was there with her husband. He had suffered a heart attack. Then there were 2 elderly neighbors from the senior condo. I think they called 911 just to get attention. It was like a party at that hospital!
It’s Jewish custom for immediate family to sit shiva after a funeral. It’s supposed to be a full week, but my mother says 3 days is acceptable. That suits me just fine. There is no way I’m spending an extra 7 days down here!
My brother lives in Florida now and he’s even more selfish than I am. He’s not happy with 3 days.
Brother: So, I have to stay in the house for 3 days?
Mother: Yes. You have to be here for people to come visit.
Brother: Does the day of the funeral count?
Mother: Yes. So, it’s only 2 days, really.
Brother: But can I take a walk in the morning before visitors arrive?
Mother: You’re really not supposed to do anything.
Brother: But what if I get sick? Would I be able to go to a doctor? I mean, I could die myself if I’m stuck in the house.
Mother: You won’t get sick.
Brother: Do I have to sit on one of those boxes?
Mother: Well, you can sit on the couch, but maybe sit on a box when company arrives.
Me: Isn’t that hypocritical?
Brother (before my mother can answer my question): Do I have to eat on the box? How do I balance my food?
And so it went on and on. At least I realized one thing. I’m not George. My brother is George. I’m Jerry. And that’s a step up from George. Maybe even two steps.
Related: Gone South
7 Comments
My condolences to you and your family… Judging from what you’ve said about your Dad, it’s obvious where you get your joie de vivre and ability to crack wise in the face of things. But be patient, be there for your Mom, as well as for yourself.
Be well.
I’m sorry. Wishing you and your family comfort during this time.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Safe home.
Thanks. It’s actually a great relief now that it’s over. The waiting was awful.
I’m so sorry. Cherish your memories and keep laughing with your Dad – even now.
Hi babe,
my condolences – and I so relate. I’m not sure people with waspy families can relate. But I can tell you that my huge Jewish and Jew(ish) family were all cracking jokes on the limos on the way to my Grandmother’s funeral. We all tend to have a healthy dose of gallows humor – and thank God. Its definitely my favorite thing about my family.
The balancing the food question had me laughing my ass off btw.
Do all Jewish families talk (really loud) with their mouths full and spit food all over?
I’m so bummed I don’t have a video for the shiva. It would’ve been gold. These people belong on youtube.