As many of you know by now, my real day job is photography. I cringe when I see bad real estate photos. If it’s a high priced listing, I get really irate. But today I’m just going to kick back and have a good laugh at the expense of these poor saps who can’t use a camera.

$249k: Log Home

Does the scary ax murderer come with the house? This home was listed under Long Island. It is located in Delaware County. A bit of a stretch. Interior shots include deer hides hanging from a balcony. You know that guy out front enjoyed gutting them with his own two hands! Nice house though.

$210k: 2 BR Coop, Mill Basin

OK, TAKE-THE-FRIGGEN-PLASTIC-OFF-OF-THE-CABINETS!

$899k: 2 Family in Park Slope

Oh look, this house has a toilet. Actually, the photos aren’t bad at all. I just had to get this in here because it’s a 2 family brick on 8th Street for under $900k. What’s the catch? Find out….open house this Sunday.

$479k: 2 Family FSBO, Crown Heights

Again with the toilet! What, it would’ve killed them to lower the lid? You just know it’s a guy taking the picture.

Philadelphia listings

This agent listed under NYC. “Had it with NY rents? Buy Philadelphia!” I think she looks cute and the photo is sweet. But that pose! Is it her high school year book photo?

$689k: 3 Family, Bed Stuy

How lazy do you have to be to not pick up a few tools, throw them in the bucket and move the friggen bucket out of the frame? I mean, really! This is the same guy with the toilet lid photo. Just give up, Mark. Why get out of bed in the morning? Must be a huge effort.

Ladies, doesn’t this look like that one night stand you had when you were too drunk to remember anything? This shot is plastered all over his Hudson Valley Craigs listings, but I was bummed to find out it looked sharp on his website. So I can only partially mock. Informative blog too.

I’m not going to post this last photo. Click on link to Craigs if you have good bandwidth. They just need a little lesson in screen resolution is all.